I was reading a few of the blogs that I follow this evening and I really almost cried. I almost cried because I know some amazing Godly women. I would really like to be more like them. I just need to know how to get here. If you know of a devotion or personal bible study or anything that could help me get there please let me know. And please pray for me as I strive to reach closer to God.
Saturday, December 19, 2009
I should be happy.
This is the Christmas season. I should be happy, joyful, and thankful for all of the things God has given me. But tonight I am not. I am sad and quite upset. Upset at myself for having such a gracious self sacrificing God that loves and cares for me yet I sacrifice nothing. Seriously sitting here I can not think of one thing that I have truly sacrificed. I am so grateful to have my God. I feel like I should be doing more for Him in return for the eternal life He has given me. I feel because I am failing to give more to God I am failing in my marriage and at motherhood. Not to the point of ruining my marriage or being a bad mother but I know I can be a better wife and mother I just have to get closer to God.